When I was a child, my birthday was my favorite day. For that day, I was the princess. I could ask for whatever I wanted to eat. Typically, I had a birthday party. I was given gifts, usually ones I really loved. And, everyone made me feel special.
Years later, when I became a mom, I realized all that was required to create that special birthday aura. Childbirth, no matter what the books say, does have some manner of pain associated with it. You try cramming a watermelon in a small space and ejecting it!
However, the result is always worth it. My son was the result and he’s a delightful person.
However, as a result of the birth process, if I hadn’t already known it before, I realized that my mom was special. She had done the real work on my birthday. After I thought about it, I began sending her flowers on my birthday. She deserved it! And, still she spoke glowingly of the process and the result – me. It seems that once I was born, my parents were so enthralled with the results they decided to have more children.
As I said, I feel lucky.
Not everyone is so lucky. I’ve known people who were obviously unwanted, unloved, and treated unspeakably during their childhoods. Just to show up in life and do their best required a greater effort for these people. With enough support or strength, the people with a “life deficit” of love early in their lives managed to overcome their problems. And, many became a better parent to their children than the role model they were treated to in their lives.
When I celebrated my birthday recently, I realized that the “what if” game has been banished from my life. I am no longer blaming and wishing for things that seem beyond reach. Instead, I know that I can achieve whatever I attempt – if I go about it in the right way.
What is the right way?
Make a list! (My dad always said that. We laughed, but it’s true.)
From that list, decide what’s needed to accomplish your goal.
What are the resources needed?
What will it take to succeed in time, effort, funding, people to assist?
Write it all down. Don’t delay. Anything you’re not sure of, make a note to find out the missing information, who to call or what you’ll need.
Set out daily goals. Maybe you won’t finish every goal every day. Revisit the goal, breaking it down into several steps that might be more realistic.
And, reward yourself when you achieve your goal!
I have been writing my weekly blogs for over a year now. People generally respond with a “Good post.”
Why do I write my blogs? Because I’m driven to share things I’ve learned. I care about other people having the possibility of achieving their goals. Also, I would love for others to feel special and lucky. Empowered people have better lives. They are lucky.
And, maybe it’s more than luck!
Happy Birthday – and every day!
Shelley Gillespie is Book Writing Success Coach, assisting people to achieve their goals.